Collect Your 200
by conjure-at-your-own-risk
Summary: Penny Jackson is bound to have a nice summer between making sure her new boyfriend isn't overworked, and if their new oracle survives monster attacks. Gender-Bended.


**AN: I had a 'Screw this. I'm posting it now' moment. **

**This is a prompt from ObeliskX (and I reminder that I do take requests). It was going to be only Percabeth fluff, but the other characters wormed their way in. Here's hoping that this will get more reviews and such than Walking in a Moose-Less Wonderland (come on, guys. There's Firefly quotes in there!). **

**Get the title? It's from Monopoly. You can now pass go, collect your 200… You will also see bromances, pre-slash between two demigods, and Percabeth fluff. Let me know if Penny's voice sounds like Percy's and the usual. I'm getting used to either writing from a first-person snarky American wizard or a bigender necromancer. **

**Disclaimer**: If it walks like a writer, talks like a writer, but fails to bona fide publish anything then the writer must not be Rick Riordan.

**Title**: Collect Your 200

**Word Count**: 2K

**Summary**: Penny Jackson is bound to have a nice summer between making sure her new boyfriend isn't overworked, and if their new oracle survives monster attacks. Gender-Bended.

* * *

><p>"I'm going to die," Richard Edgar Dare said plainly. "I'm going to die wearing a polo sweater while being surrounded by soul-sucking, art-hating monsters."<p>

"Lie," I told him. "No green mist or glowy eyes. That isn't going to happen."

We stared at the package that his father somehow managed to send to Camp Half-Blood. Sure, we could keep monsters and wayward pizza delivery guys out, but FedEx was apparently unstoppable. His dad had the idea that his son was off at some youth leadership seminar for the remainder of the summer. And, you know, Richie was having a fantastic time up until the package came with the reminder about his deal.

At times like this I really wanted to punch his dad in the face. I was that kind of friend.

Inside was Richie's uniform for the upcoming school year: A gray polo shirt and a pair of khakis. There was also a handbook about the all boys' school, outlining every proper code of conduct that would try to crush his creative spirit. You know, fun stuff.

"One school had me wear a tie-dye shirt for gym class," I said. "Then it got all burned and covered in monster guts. You would have loved it."

Richie's freckled expression of complete misery turned to pity. Even someone as artistic as him drew the line somewhere.

He sighed. I sighed.

"Go to your boyfriend," my redhead and pitiful friend told me in a somber voice. "I'll just stand here and die."

"You have sword fighting practice," I reminded him. Chiron was not going to have another doomed Oracle, so he had the great idea of Richie being taught how to fight. Sadly, not all weapons came to him like purple hairbrushes did, and many of us were resorting to Rock-Paper-Scissors on who was going to be overseeing the job.

Nichole had lost last night's match.

She was not looking forward to it.

"Ugh," he said.

"Hang in there, man." I patted his shoulder. "You can do this."

"You suck at pep talks."

"Don't I know it!" I held my fist up for a fistbump that he didn't return. "Come on," I said, forcing nothing but cheer in my voice. "Who's going to survive a super preppy school in Connecticut? Who's the guy?"

Richie gave me a pained smile and weakly fistbumped me back. I waved and made my way to see my favorite head counselor at camp.

I found Archimedes out cold on a pile of papers and textbooks. He was hunched over his desk, his sleepy state not really caring that he was probably ruining several projects with using them as a pillow. At least his laptop wasn't anywhere near the mess. The last time that had happened, he forgot to charge it and thankfully didn't lose anything, but in his bout of anxiety you couldn't really tell.

My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen. He was head counselor for the Athena Cabin. Someone with blond curls that would make a fairytale prince jealous and the stormy eyes to back them away. And he was my sleepy, overworked architect of an adorable boyfriend, and I wouldn't change him for anyone else.

I did what any girlfriend would do and I poked the back of his neck with a pencil that was conveniently around. "Wakey, wakey."

Archimedes stirred so I poked him a _little_ harder. Maybe it was near that sensitive pressure point or something, but whatever it was, he reacted like someone had stuck his finger in an outlet.

"Holy, son of a—" His body jerked up suddenly, his chair almost tipping backwards.

"Daughter of," I corrected. I pushed his chair down. "I'm the holy daughter of Poseidon."

Archimedes mumbled something and rubbed the back of his neck. "Hilarious. Am I on patrol duty right now?"

"Nah. That's tomorrow." I pushed his work to the side and I sat on his desk. "You missed breakfast again. You kinda need to eat if you want to build something for the gods. I hate to see what happens when you fall asleep when telling Ares about his weapons room."

"Are they offering vacation time?" He folded his arms on the tops of my knees, looking up at me with a myriad of emotions in his gray eyes. "Anything else besides a wakeup call and a reminder to eat?"

I put a blueberry muffin in his hands and I kissed the top of his head. His hair looked more like a rat's nest than its usual careful curls. "Come on, Wise Guy. I'm here to lure you away from building plans and erasers. Grab some sweats, we're going to spar."

He gave me a slow look that went from the tips of my toes to the top of my head. It ensured a very tingly feeling in my stomach. "But you're invulnerable?"

"And maybe the better fighter. Only one way to find out. Up and at 'em, you're coming with me now."

I jumped off his desk and stretched my arms out. Archimedes chewed on a piece of his muffin top thoughtfully. He was giving me the same look that he did to me when we first met. Analytical. I thought he was handling it pretty well since I've gotten the invulnerability. If my ego would get too big all Greek mythology-sized, he would find a way to deflate me. I had no doubt in that.

Compared to when we first met, he also looked really different now. Sure there were the signs of getting older. His shoulders were wider and he was taller; all which wasn't that useful because I had him later pinned and squirming under me as we were fighting in the sandpit.

It was a good kind of an ego boost. Our sparring hadn't last long. He was exhausted from the planning building designs, and I was teaching little kids how not to fall on their swords. Add that with teaching Richie how to survive and regular patrol duty, and I was probably in the best shape of my life.

"Can I tell you what I think?" I said.

"What?" He freed one tanned leg under me.

"I'm like a superhero. Look at this muscle!" I shifted my weight and pressed my forearm against his chest. I clenched one arm and tensed the muscles. "I'm _invincible_," I quoted _Monty Python_.

"You're a loony but still ticklish." With both legs free, he nudged my hips with his knees and pulled himself up.

I could feel his fingers on my stomach and I was soon laughing. The funny thing about being invulnerable was that I could still _feel_ things, but it was different. I felt really aware of how sensitive my skin was and the roughness of his fingertips. It was either the effects of going for the gold in River Styx, hormones with the boyfriend, or both.

I was on my back and he was over me, my tank top was ridding up and he was starting to look just as disheveled ad sweaty…okay, maybe it was more of hormones. Which led the laughter into kissing—and I had no trouble feeling his lips—and into more kissing which was _niiiccceee_. I think I was getting the hang of the whole relationship thing. Have meaningful conversation with boyfriend, establish some sort of witty banter over something physical, be romantic dorks and later make out enough to turn my knees into jelly and enjoy—

And then the sounds of our friends' loud voices broke us regrettably apart.

"Ugh," I said as Archimedes rolled off me. It was such a nice thing we were having such a good time, too…

"They're your friends now," he muttered. He sat up and slicked his hair back, trying to make himself seemed presentable before any kind of teasing started. He was breathing hard and his face was still a brilliant shade of pink. My stupefied expression was maybe just as guilty.

I stood up and saw Nichole stomping toward us on the sandpit with her sword strapped to her hip, and our shiny new oracle trailing behind her.

"Sorry! I didn't mean to!" Riche apologized over and over again as Nichole tried to brush him off. She was cradling her arm that was bleeding a lot over her black shirt.

"Make him shut up. His apologies are hurting more than this," she begged me. Her pale face was blotchy from embarrassment, but at least she wasn't white-faced or glassy-eyed from blood loss. "I'm not dying."

"Richie, grab Will," I ordered. I directed him in the right direction. "She's the head of the Apollo Cabin. She can fix Nichole up." He rushed off and I was left with a grumpy necromancer and an embarrassed boyfriend. "What happened?" I asked.

"He's a danger to himself and others," Nichole said. "If Chiron's so worried then we should get him a bodyguard." With regret masking her face, she took her aviator jacket off and used that to apply pressure on her wound. It was a long slash that went from the tip of her elbow down the side of her arm, thankfully not hitting the wrist.

Archimedes whistled. "Nice work he did there."

"If only he's this lethal with monsters," she muttered, averting my gaze. "Penny, I know you think highly of him, but come on. I don't trust this guy with a toothpick."

We were still talking to Nichole as Richie came back with our new head healer at Camp Half-Blood.

Will Solace was also sadly one of the younger head counselors. She was a few years behind me, and had the same fair hair and blue eyes as the rest of her siblings. She approached us with sunscreen on her face and flip-flops dangling from one hand and a big red bag in the other.

"Fun," she said. She put her bag down and started taking out supplies like a washcloth, gauze, scissors, and nectar. "I sit down for one second and someone's about to lose an arm."

"I just did what she told me to—and my wrist did a weird thing—" Richie covered his face with his hands and groaned. "I so _suck_ at this."

"We'll give you a hairbrush to scare monsters off." Archimedes patted his shoulder. "What else should we cross off on our weapon's list?"

"Tried archery yet?" Will looked up from wrapping up Nichole's injury with gauze and a minimal amount of nectar. Our supply was really low since the war ended. She saw the miserable look on Richie's face and my wincing one. We had tried archery last week and it wasn't pretty. It took us a while to get those arrows out of the wall of the Big House. "Gods, you're really pale, di Angelo. Ever thought about Vitamin D supplements? And are you noticing any…"

Nichole leveled her with a glare. "I'm fine."

"You have the complexion of a corpse." Will raised an eyebrow, taking her duties as the new head healer seriously.

"I'm the daughter of a death god, not some sunshine-happy one. I'm more likely to combust into flames if I'm out here any longer."

Will's face flushed and Richie spoke up. "You're are pale as the Stay-Puff Marshmallow Man."

Nichole coughed, making her arm jerk as it was being wrapped up. "I'm what?"

"I thought she would get the reference," he said to me sheepishly. I felt his pain. There were even some movies that my boyfriend had missed out on due to staying at camp so long. We had a plan once we meet up again during winter break.

"We'll have to marathon then," Archimedes said. He had an arm slung over my shoulders. We were getting good at doing coupley stuff like that. Sat tuned for next week and we'll think of trying out cringe-worthy nicknames that went beyond 'Seaweed Brain' and 'Wise Guy'. "What do you say, Solace? Will she be up and ready to watch some cheesy eighties movies?"

"She'll live if Richie doesn't go near her with a sword." Nichole made a face at him and Will asked, "Javelin? Knife? Come on, has anything worked for you?"

"I can do creepy rhymes about gloom and doom randomly?" he shrugged. "I can draw you a cool picture if you want? I'm useless with anything else."

"I already like him more than our old one." Will put her stuff back in her bag and shrugged her flip flops on. "Okay, I'm going to relax finally. No one's allowed to get seriously injured for the rest of the day. Good thing I don't have to worry about you." She pointed at me. "Invulnerability. You get all the luck, Penny."

"That's me," I said. "I'm a lucky penny."

That only gave me groans from everyone. Wow, I thought people would be more appreciative of my word skills by now. I had even passed sophomore English, for the love of the gods.

"Really?" my boyfriend said. "You go with that?"

"That beats the puns we had during math class," said Richie. "I'm ashamed."

Nichole was just shaking her head in shame. Will rolled her eyes. "Our heroine of Olympus."

"Okay," I said. "Then how about the one with the satyr, the hydra, and a leprechaun walk into a bar…"

Archimedes silenced me with a kiss. "Punch line, later."

"You're just jealous of my amazing wordplay," I pouted. "I'm hilarious and you guys know it."


End file.
